POLISHING THE SOUL
PORTRAITS OF A YOUNG FIGHTER
"It's not what's said, it's about the feelings across the table."
Jean Renoir
Even before I fully understood it, it resonated with me. Finding relatability is how I determine what I find interesting. That sensation is one of the key factors in manifesting and creating for myself, and it doesn't require much thought or even feeling; it comes from the core.
It's a gut instinct that feels prompted by an external force. The only thing I am certain about when it comes to this feeling is that I must continue to pay intense attention and to ask questions. A paradox of sorts. Over time, I really have come to value that instinct. It allows the work to flow more easily. I'm no longer in the way; I am not trying. The work is just something that is happening; it doesn’t feel like thinking. All of the projects I am proud of that include close friends, family, and sometimes, even strangers, have been carried by the gut instinct I am
describing. Now it has brought me to Chris.
I've known him for years; we first met through skateboarding. Skateboarding helped all of my friends, and I stay active in daily life, and for a lot of us, it distracts us from issues big and small in a way that pushes us to improve at something. Using internal and external conflict in life as motivation became an intrinsic part of Chris's being.
"I’m trying not become the person that my environment could make me into."
- Chris
There isn’t an outward acknowledgement that he has of being a creative person;
his self expression seems to be through the creation of movement.
Skating resonates with Chris still, but boxing and mixed martial arts are what
are driving Chris to reinvent himself in areas of his life where he has acted
egregiously. Boxing has made Chris more conscious of his flaws and his
decision-making, which can be difficult to confront in the routine of daily life.
As vocal as he has been about changing his ways, action is the defining
characteristic of change, in my opinion.
Your past decisions and actions may not necessarily be reflective of who you are right now.
You still have to live with the consequences, which is another great way of learning acceptance.
Trying hard or putting in the effort is sometimes looked at as a negative thing.
I find it surprising how many people will pull back when they see someone independent doing
something new or moving away from the herd.
It’s important to be aware of who isn’t clapping for you, as you take the small steps forward.
- Cormac Crump